58 hours of Community Service all done... Today was rather a little laid back and easier coz I was made to sit in the workstation to do some paper work... hehe.. Then shred paper to pieces..
I thank God for listening and understanding... I was at my most heaviest flow ever.. and I can feel it oozing with every move.. I was so uncomfortable.. Anyway... I turn down a lunch out with Mr today.. can you believe that? I turn him down.. because of this stupid period of the month.. I was feeling so shitty.. so easily irritated.. everything doesn't seem right... I have no mood to step out of my house.. I have no mood to go anywhere..
Mama reached home and told me that Grandma is not happy with me going out with a White man.. Now now.. Who told her that? Who spread the news.. Only Mas' ex, Aunt Mila and her hubby know.. 3 main suspects.. She also heard about the third party involvement in Mas' marriage.. and she believe them... 3 main suspects remain... I hate my extended family!!! I hate my gradma, my aunties, my uncles, my cousins... their mouth just loves to speak bad about other people, never had that little piece of appreciation from what people have done for them, no sense of contentment from what they already have.. I dunno why these people love to talk and gossip about other people(my family) a lot.. They talk about these people(my family) as if they own them(my family), as if they supported their(my family) financial stand, as if they took care of them(my family)....
I dun live to please people.. I live to my own expences, my own emotions, my feelings.. Heck 'em.... I dun care if they spread rumours about me, if they talked bad behind my back.. But if they ever make anyone I care about cry, they would get it from me, myself.. I just had had enough of this shit.. Have been putting up with it for so long.. for 8 years!!! I simply can't keep caring and trying to please them anymore.. I haven't done that pleasing for the last 3 years... and I have no reason to start pleasing them now..
Oh well, dinner time.. Till later~
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