Yeah, no school today.. yet here I am in the school library.. My PC still at the shop in the process of recovery.. Should be able to discharge her on Saturday noon or something.. The computer doctors said she is in critical state and need to operate her hard disk.. How sad.. Lucky for me, i need not pay a single cent if the organs are still under warranty which I think there all are till 4th September 2005.
I feel so empty without her.. My PC.. maybe I should name her now.. How about... Jesslyn...? Since our names starts with J.. maybe her name should starts with J too.. For now, her name is Jesslyn.. Ooppss.. am I weird or what? Naming my PC... hehe..
Maybe this experience without having your PC whilst being so committed to write a blog makes you one.. Haha.. I feel so restless not being able to update my blog as often as I wanted to.. I know everyone would the most post once a day but I only feel good posting twice a day.. SO imagine how I am feeling not being able to post everyday..
Anyway, I have been visualising my future a lot yesterday.. On what I want, what I can do, with what I have.. What I see myself in 5 years, 10 years and 15 years ahead.. I want to have a degree in hand or the least working on it in 5 years time, hopefully still with Mr.. then maybe I would settle down with him... In 10 years time, I see myself working in a respectable position earning a considerably high income... I always see myself as an engineer going down to site supervising methods used and the progress they are at.. Seeing myself challenged in my field of study.. Seeing myself winning tenders of contracts.. And in 15 years time, I would be 35.. I would still be working... maybe considering and planning to retire early and enjoy the better years ahead relax with all my kids.. Believe it or not, I still think I am superwoman to have lots of kids and still working in a rather fast pace.. Haha.. I like thinking that I am capable.. that I can cope.. that I can multi-task myself... To a point, I sometime multi-task too much and became so stressed over everything..
How many kids I want to have? Ideally... maybe 3... but I would love to have more if god grants me.. I am still rather a little traditional to want a boy as the first child.. haha.. OK.. now.. Why am I talking about having kids? Hmmm.. Naaa... I am not pregnant.. haha.. far from it.. At least not for now.. But if I am.. I would love the child the same.. and still have the same dreams and work on them.. To think that I can foresee my future, I still don't.. I think everything will go fine.. Maybe my concept of 'If it's meant to be, it would be.. If it's not, it's just not' help me a lot..
I sometime amaze people by how easy I take things into my head.. How I smiled when something failed me? How I lift myself up after every fall with a laugh? How I have moved on after some major failures? I amaze myself by all these more than I would someone else, really..
Alright now.. Gotta dash.. For food, preferably.. c",)
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