Sincerity is Important

Assalammu'alaikum. Alhamdulillah, another day has come to allow me to indulge in the greatness of Allah's creations on Earth. I have learnt yet another lesson in life.

A lesson that took me many many years, and many many downfalls, along with many many buckets of tears from my eyes. And here, I did not exactly learn from my mistakes, but I learn upon realization, analyzing and doing what is advised and prove the theory myself.

In many of my past relationships, I realized that I was never totally sincere. "Relationships" here refer to all kinds of relationship. I realized that I changed, and do good because I was hoping for something in return, I was not sincere. I did it to receive something better. I get upset, angry, sad, and confused when I did not receive anything after doing something I called marvelous, or as what they wanted me to do. This also reflect on my changes in life. I mean, in my quarter decade, I have attempted twice before to cover up, all of which didn't last long, and the reason behind it was because I never did it for Allah, or for my own good. I did it because I want people to say something good about myself, I want people to notice me, I want attention. And this I have to admit, was childish and stupid.

I won't want to say much about my current changes, for I know not what the future brings. However, insya'Allah, this will be able to last a lifetime, because I know now that I am sincere in answering His calls, I know now that I am sincere to change for the better, and most importantly for Allah.

This view and this sincerity of greatness from Allah has spread across to my relationships. I tried my best to be sincere, I remind myself every night before sleep, and every morning when I wake up. I told myself that I want to be sincere, that I can be sincere, and that I will be sincere. This comes with a reminder, that I should not hope for any returns of deeds. I also told myself that I want to be able to control my anger and temper, that I should allow myself time to cool down before reacting. I want to, and that I will. This little prep talks became habits that I instill, and it helped me through my days up to date.

In my current relationships, because I am now trying my best to be sincere, I get rewards that I never asked for. Rewards that noone but myself can see and feel. The rewards Allah gave me is the will to seek knowledge, to stay close to Him and to get closer to Him. He opened my heart. He gave me peace of mind, He lessen my burden not by eliminating my problems that I face, but he gave me strength to face up with my problems, and patience to go through it till the end. And every step is a test for me. I was never known to be patient, or slow-paced. For me to have patience, and to go really slow in getting things done, is a big challenge for me - and it is very rewarding (at least for me it is).

In my current days now, I eliminate hatred from my dictionary. Hatred to me now, means a lot of energy that brings me nowhere. I had replaced hatred with forgiveness. Forgiving someone brings change, brings about second chances, brings about cleanliness or some people term it as purity or redemption to renew.

When someone I love tells me something that hurts me, I closed my eyes, and breathe. I tell myself that it is okay and that I should forgive, and with this forgiveness in heart, I reminded myself that everyone needs to be reminded. And so I ended up telling them that I'm still here for them, no matter what. For I want the best for them, I remind them to remember and seek help for Him who could and He who knew best what could help. Doing this sometimes invite them to hurt me more by saying they dun care, and at times they tell me upfront that they dun need me anymore.

I never left those I love, I just couldn't because I love them. I love them, so all the more I shouldn't because I care for them and I want to be there for them. Love as they say, is complicated. But it is actually a simple equation, really. Just look at how Allah love us all. We can take His example to start with. If that is hard, maybe we can look at how our Prophet Muhammad loved us. He never left us stranded, did he? He never disrespect us, did he?

Allah for one, I knew, never closed His doors to any of His servant no matter how much that servant has betrayed or hurt Him. He allowed His doors to remain open and to constantly remind His servant through the sunrise and sunset. Prophet Muhammad, is one that I honoured and respect the most. Despite facing terrible pain of death, he still prayed and hoped for the best of his citizens. He was still thinking of us -his citizen. He was still praying for our welfares, and was seeking for our convenience instead of his. He never asked Allah to ease his pain when faced with the pain of death. He never asked Allah for his own benefits sake, instead, he asked Allah to give us a promise and to grant us a wish to be with him there in Heaven. He was worried about us, he was sincere. For this, I now wake up thanking him and Allah. I thank Prophet Muhammad by praying for him - Shalawat. I thank Allah, by remembering him - Zikir.

With great examples like this. Knowing that our creator Himself, is willing to continually forgive us all over and over again. Giving us all second chances to change for the better sincerely. Our prophet, despite being the best of the best, bow down humbly in due respect for his other counter parts, and speaks with kindness, and explains patiently, and thinks of others whom he loved. Why couldn't we, the normal humans, do the same or more? Afterall we are all His servants, shouldn't we be ashamed? Shouldn't we feel disgusted when we tried to judge others, and speak rudely of others, and not think of others?

Then again, my friends, everything has to start with you. You have to respect yourself before you can truly respect others. You have to love yourself before you can truly love others. You have to have something positive to say about yourself before you can see the positive attributes in other people around you. Everything begins with you. If you want to see the strengths in other people, you have to first know your own strengths, and recognize your weakness. When you know you weakness, you naturally look for someone who is strong is your weakness, so they can influence you to be strong too.

Always remember, my dearest friends, regardless of what religion, race or language you speak, everything begins with you. If you want others to learn and respect what is norm to you, you have to have adequate knowledge and upmost respect for it first. And if you have got that core, you'd want to start with yourself. You'd want to learn other people's norm and be sincere about it. Sincerity is Important.

With sincerity, comes many other good attributes in life that will attract many other good attributes that will help in future and through your whole life.

May today's lesson brings about a better tomorrow with more lessons to learn to bring a better week ahead. Insya'Allah.

Assalammu'alaikum.