Still without good news to share...

Assalammu'alaikum family and friends,

Today I shared about how hungry I was, and as with hunger, you start imagining all sorts of food that you havent had in a long time. Then, it stung me. Many of my hopeful and lovely friends start thinking it was possibly a little one in the making. I wish.... I dreadfully wish I had that news to share, but I don't.

I too was hoping, so I don't blame the many others who were wishing and praying for us. It was just Bloody Mary visiting me, just as I was about to buy the HPT. Always the case sometimes, and as I was about to give up hope... My ustazah reminded me of Allah's promise. When he answers your prayers immediately or soon enough, He loves you. If He delays your wishful do'a, He is testing you. If He doesn't fulfil your do'a, He has a better plan for you. I accepted and redha. Perhaps, I do not have what it takes, just yet, or perhaps I am having too much going on right now. I am still holding on to my hope.

This taught me not to ask, assume or speculate. Allow the person to reply and if he/she doesn't, to just let the matter rest. It hurts me, still. After 15months of the golden question, it still hurts me to say No, havent or to simply shake my head.

I am emoing listening to some love songs, and ironically it soothes me. Maybe because I have a love story to die for now. You know, having someone to irritate and annoy your whole life sounds like fun to me, then I got reminded that I will also be irritated and annoyed my whole life! Dang!

And so now.. I nudge the husband for a little Subway trip down in JB, but I tell you a secret shall I?

Actually.. I don't care where he brings me, as long as... at least one of my cravings are satisfied! You know how anal bloody mary is, right? Well, this one is not too anal, so just one at the very least! SUBWAY pls..

Oh wells. Whatever, wherever, as long as it is with you my Imami.

I wanna just run away from this office now, catch up again  laters you all!

Wassalam,
Jun