Women...

Assalammu'alaikum family, friends, readers and followers of this blog. I have been wanting to write about this in the longest time but keep putting it off.

I guess it is about time. People often misinterpreted the Islamic ways of protecting their women as oppression, but it isn't. Afterall, it is not the Quran that says women should be made bald if she refused to cover her hair. Go google and check where that come from.

Honestly speaking, we can do what men do, but we got a lot more to lose than the men when we do that.

As much as we have freedom to befriend whoever we want, there is always restrictions for us when we befriended a male. I grew up in a male environment, accustomed to their harsh jokes and their silly conversations that may disgust most ladies.

I never really restrict myself until I received the hidayah to cover up, to dress more modestly, to behave more appropriately, to speak less and to refrain from unbeneficial acts. I never enjoyed late nights anymore. I felt very ashamed to be out with a male friend alone. Maybe it is the way I was protected.

When I got engaged, I got less involved with my male friends, and start making some female friends. It was awkward as hell I tell you! A meet up with female friends was such a nerve-wrecking experience. My jokes were offensive to them, sometimes my refusal to join them even became such a sensitive issue. I slowly adapt.

When I got married I have even lesser involvement with my male friends, and if I wish to, my husband will be dragged along. Alhamdulillah, my male friends are very understanding and accommodating, they will actually send a text to my husband directly when they wish to meet up.

During the process, I made more and more female friends, Not THAT many, but enough to occupy me. Most good enough to correct and advice me. So much I become very makcik-makcik. hehehe..

And just as I put this away to type another day, I came across this post on FB by Khainis Tahir who is known for the rugged style of dakwah, and goes with #NisaRuggedTalk‬.

Honestly, I like her style, I came across her posts when someone in my friendlist shared one of her post, and had followed her since then. Her Hijrah Story Compilation reaches out to me. I am not perfect, yes I do a lot of stuff back then before I don the hijab, but it was in my past and it is something I cannot change. 

Anyway, back to this women restriction. Do you know how much Allah loves us women, and had therefore wish to conceal us, to protect us. We were taught to be modest, to care a lot for our aurat, to really care for our chastity, to be careful with whom you mingle with, with whom you are touching. We are precious, very precious in the eyes of Islam.

Do you even know that all the household chores we have been doing is actually the husband's or the men's rightful duties? We are very protected.. Do you know that any income received by a woman is her rights, and she has every right to spend it in any way she deems right, but the men have to provide for us, even if we can afford to provide them ourselves?

Okay.. I am straying again from the topic. OK focus. Women's restrictions. Rightfully, we need a mahram with us whenever we are stepping out of our home. This is to prevent fitnah as well as to protect the women, should anything happen there is her mahram to protect and care for her.

We are like the Queens (go to the links, she had given an example of a diamond and a diamond handler), which not any Tom Dick and Harry can any oh how touch us as they like. Gazes need to be lowered. We are taught a lot to be shy, to have a good strong sense of hayaa'. We are not to shamelessly go out and expose ourselves.

Sometimes the syaitan come and whispers "oh why are you giving so much rights to the men, when you can do it yourself, you don't need them"

It is not that we cant do it ourselves, but THEY are suppose to protect us. Besides, why tarnish your reputation by exposing yourselves with so many men before your husband? Why tarnish your reputation and put your husband at stake by still insisting to go out with your male friends without him? It is like offering a kid with a candy unwrapped and picked up from the floor. The kid dont deserve that. The kid deserved a clean wrapped candy.

Likewise, your husband. Then I heard people say "Ala, he isn't perfect either, he goes out late night too, he yada yada yada"

Well, he is a man, he got nothing to lose. His sins, and he is held responsible by his ol'good self. Unlike us, women, our sins are questionable and answerable by her walis and mahrams. Her father will be questioned, her brother will be questioned, her husband will be questioned, her uncles, even, will be questioned.

If ALL of her walis and mahrams have religiously adviced her, and corrected her and tried their best, and never failed to doa for her, then perhaps, she will be answerable to her own actions.

So be wise. Care for your body, care for your gaze, care for your speech. Practice hayaa'.

I am indeed not perfect, but I am thankful that I have people around me who never stopped caring and correcting me. I am grateful.

We women have a lot to lose, and male friends are not that difficult to understand the change if you tell them so. My male friends understand why I don't always chat them up, what more meet them. They know my restrictions, and alhamdullillah they have all been understanding and accommodating. If these male friends make fun of you for not being "sporting" for being "kolot", perhaps. just perhaps, it is time to really consider which is more important, friends or ALLAH SWT.

When you have the right intentions, insyaAllah Allah will test you, guide you and with faith, He will also make it easy for you.

The once a bad girl,
Jun

Wassalam.

Salted Egg - Review of Asyura Salted Egg Paste

Assalammu'alaikum family, friends, readers and followers of this blog. Once again, another review to write! Alhamdulillah..

When I heard about Asyura coming up with Salted Egg Paste, I quickly texted a friend who is a butcher and had pastes from Asyura at her stall if she is taking orders. And when she said yes, I was elated. Even so, I was too late to reserve one during the first batch of orders, people snapped it away from the stall too quickly.

So when she told me she is taking orders again, I quickly reserved 2 packets, and scheduled to collect it the following Saturday, along with my chicken and mutton!

The first time I tried, it was too dry - I didnt follow instructions well. So I tempted a second time and it was marvellous!!

What is important is it is EASY!

What you need:-

The Paste:

It cost $5 at my friend's shop!

I got the paste from a friends shop located at Gombak Market #01-236 for just $5!

The Main Ingredient:

You can use chicken, prawns, squids and pretty much anything you feel like, even crabs! 

I used this chicken popcorn:

You can get this from NTUC or Sheng Siong

2 packets of these to 1 packet of paste. :)

Curry Leaves:

I bought it from a Minimart

Cili Padi:

Easy to get these la!

And butter and water, and that's it!

How to cook:

First, fry your main ingredient or half cook it. Any way you want. I prefer to use a bit of flour to fry the main ingredient with to give it more crunch. Or for me, since I use the popcorn, I just fry it as is. After you fry them all, drain the oil and put it aside.

Take about 200g of butter (or by eye/feel), and put in the hot frying pan.
Simmer it along with curry leaves and cili padi.
When it withers a little, put in the paste, and add in water. (Amount of water : paste should be 1:1).

For a whole packet of paste i probably use 2-3 cups. Again go by the eye, if it looks too dry, add more water. Let it simmer and thicken (abt 5minutes).

Then put in your main ingredient and stir it well, and off the stove.

You are done!

The results:

Yummylicious!

So yummy, it is all wallopped within minutes! 

Oh it is fast, and best served hot!

Give it a try, you wont regret it! 

Your instant cooker,

Jun

Wassalam

Fold Away - Review of Polar Notions

Assalammu'alaikum family, friends, readers and followers of this blog. I haven't been reviewing lately, and I guess I really should do some..

I am reviewing the Polar Notion (the mini bolt fabric organizer), as pictured here:

I bought these via Amazon at US$64 for a pack of 50, I got 2 sets to qualify for free shipping. And no I don't have an Amazon account, so I hike the ride order via my friend who was ordering some items herself.

It may be an expensive investment, but it is worth it once I got all my fabric folded and arranged neatly. Here's what my sildoll collection looked like after being folded using these fancy Polar Notion:

Neat eh? Now I can see clearly the colors and prints I have!

Here's what my shelf looked like now:

I clearly look like I have lots of space to get more fabric! Someone said I had too little considering my reputation of getting lots from the destash group, and one asked how I keep my hoard this small. Heh, I just sew away when the mood arrives.

The only sad thing is that my shelf could not accommodate the height, so they all had to lie down like that, but it is definitely a neat booster. I wouldn't be able to fold that consistently and neatly without Polar Notions.

Now all my boxes can be put to better use to keep other stuff, notions perhaps. And this thing make me enjoy folding all my fabrics!

So fold away!

Your Fabric Hoarder,
Jun

Wassalam

Ramadhan

Assalammu'alaikum family, friends, readers and followers of this blog. It is Ramadhan and as usual, the media will be flooded with what some people call Ramadhan Muslims. Subhanallah, I hope such naming stop.

Why condemn these people? Aren't they doing good? How do you know if they are sincere in becoming a better Muslim? How sure are you that they would return to their old self when Ramadhan is over? This Ramadhan could be their time to change, it could be their last, then would you hold yourself responsible should they succumb to your accusation and just cry at home wanting so badly to be a better Muslim but was deterred by people like you who had easily convinced them that there is no room for forgiveness because they sin too much? Who are you?

May I remind you that Allah SWT is the Most Forgiving, as long as you had sincerely seek His Forgiveness? Then who are to deny this?

I am not perfect, far from it. I sin from time to time, and I shamelessly seek forgiveness again and again, and more so in the month of Ramadhan. This is the window that I can totally focus on my ibadah during the 1 hr lunch break, the time I do not need to rush to buy food and rush back into the office. It is the only time, that come only ONCE a year, where in that one hour, I can give my time entirely for Him, to complain to Him, to seek from Him, to tell Him about what I want to achieve, about the help I need from Him. It is the only time where I wake up purposely in the last third of the night, an opportunity to make mends with the silaturrahim with my family, to eat with my family and to grab the opportunity to pray and seek for ease in all our affairs. The only time I get to eat together as a family unit during breaking fast, and the only time we all head down to the masjid as a family unit, together. In the same jemaah, together enslave to Allah, to seek His Forgiveness and Acceptance, then why? Why deny that opportunity for those who may have sinned before? Why?

I am happy to see some changes in myself, my husband, my mother, my sisters, my nieces and my nephews. I am happy for them, when they see the light of Ramadhan, the joy of Ramadhan. Something you can't get in other months.

I enjoy every morning when my husband wake me up for Sahur, for Subuh, and for work. I like how he ask me to hurry up and do my solat, so we can all go to the masjid together. I wished Ramadhan never ends because this is what I wake up for, to give all I can in the name of ibadah.

So what if I am a Ramadhan Muslim? At least I tried, at least I know it is in my power to be a better Muslim, that Allah still loves me and continue to guide me, in hope what I do in this month becomes a habit for many months that follows, to the next Ramadhan insyaAllah.

This is the last leg of Ramadhan, the last 9 days... Do not deny the people who wanted to give their all in this last leg. Don't. Instead, encourage them. And do doa for them, hopefully, this will make them change into a better Muslim, better than me, better than you.

Maybe someone else will pray for us, for us to be better Muslim too.

Ramadhan, ya Ramadhan.. I wish you won't end.

Feeling sad to say goodbye,
Jun

Wassalam.

Vaccine I had to take...

Assalammu'alaikum family, friends, readers and followers of this blog. I know I havent blogged a lot lately, so I decide to just write a simple one today.

Last Monday I had my regular 6-monthly follow-up appointment with my doctor to see the condition of my lungs. It is rather obvious that my lungs are permanently damaged from the previous infection.

I had chest xray and spirometry test done that day. I think I've mentioned how much I hated the spirometry test. I tried the best I could, and the results remained the same. There is a significant decrease in the air volume in my lungs, and the doctor again mentioned about the permanent scarring left from the infection I had last year. Apparently the left lower lobe of my lungs had narrowed, so it restricts my air intake, which explains why I get breathless when I walked to quickly for 1-2km, and when I take 2-3 flights of stairs.

With that, doctor said I have Bronchiectasis, which means I have permanent dilation of airways, and it is mandatory for me to get yearly Flu Vaccine, and she even put me on Prevnar Vaccination to help shield my lungs from future infection.

Sounds scary, if you asked me. I had potentials of a collapse lung if the lobe continue to narrow itself due to the scarring. Through the scope, my left lung is smaller than my right lung. It takes me longer time to catch my breath, if others take 1 minute to catch up, I'd take 5 minutes. Sometimes, when I get excited and started to talk a lot, I will end up panting..

So after two jabs on both arms, I got home feeling miserable, tired, feverish, and couldnt really raise my hands up. I was down with sore throat and cough the next day. And pretty much ended up lying on my bed to sleep the day away. Somehow I even felt like a baby after a jab, because I was cranky, and I was so uncomfortable the whole day.

During such times, I wished I really don't have to go out to work. I really wish I can afford to stay at home. Right now, my eyes felt a little puffy, and it felt so hard to keep them open.

Oh did I tell you Prevnar was expensive? For 0.5ml, it costs $90.65! And all the tests I did costs another $90 odd.. So there you go.. $180 gone, blown into the hospital..

And oh! My doctor seemed to have a really nice handwriting! Not the typical doctor handwriting, look!

So ya, that's it!
To the next Vaccine,
Jun

Wassalm

Ahlan Wa Sahlan ya Ramadhan Al Mubarak!

Assalammu'alaikum family, friends, readers and followers of this blog. Ahlan Wa Sahlan ya Ramadhan Al Mubarak!

It is Ramadhan already.. We had our first terawih (night prayers) last night, and it was an emotional one for me. It is the first Ramadhan without my father.

I keep tearing in midst of the welcome speech by the imam, I get teary when they say the salawat at the end of the 20 rakaat of terawih, I was an emotional wreck alright, especially after the witir.. all the salams, I missed my father. I miss having to find him, I miss having to chase him because he was heading to the wrong door, I miss kissing his hand. I miss everything him.

What made it more emotional was that someone pulled my mom's dress and wrongfully accused her for wearing colorful (it was blunt colors of bland turqoise and purple with marroon tudung, btw) apparel when my dad had just departed for a month. HEY! There is a way to correct people, and this is not a good way, This is embarassing for my mother, and it made both me and my sister angry.

First off, it is not mentioned in any hadith that a women in iddah (from the passing of her husband) that she should only wear white or black. There is no mention that the said women should refine herself to the four walls only, there is no mention of such oppression! Eh hello.. my mom went to the masjid, to pray, Not to dance and attract people. For her to mention such had made many hearts ache.. And my grandma had also asked for advice from an Ustazd if such women can still go to the masjid, and go out when necessary, and the ustadz said yes. IF the intention is for Ibadaah, then it is HARUS. It is not mentioned about restricted colors or any sort.

I was mad, yes I was. Then I was reminded of this article.

"“Kemudian Allah SWT berfirman kepada orang yang menuntut itu, “Angkatlah kepalamu dan lihatlah Syurga.”

Dijawab oleh Allah SWT, “Engkau pun dapat membayarnya, iaitu dengan mengampuni orang yang telah menzalimimu itu.”

I want to have a chance to be in Paradise... And I guess for that, I will be willing to forgive people. Even when it still hurts.. Even when I feel it is unfair. The faith I have in Allah, that his promises are true, then for that, I shall forgive.. I do not deserve His Paradise, but I am not willing to be punished in His Hell.. For that I hoped for his mercy.. To forgive me, and give me a chance to be in His Paradise along with my beloved family..

I am sure my father is smiling watching Paradise through the open doors throughout this blessed month of Ramadhan.

I hope the many days of Ramadhan ahead brings us more faith, more good deeds, and eliminate all bad thinkings and doings..

Yup, definitely, eliminate revenge, cleanse the heart and straighten out our purpose. Have a blessed Ramadhan everyone. May we continue to unite as an Ummah and do our Rasullullah A.S. proud.

May our family raise together with strength, unity and happiness always.

Wassalam,
Jun