Juggling one too many...

Got my new Aplha 10 tires for $300... Installed my 2 way alarm for $30... But K said they had cut some wires wrongly and didnt do a proper job... Oh well...

On a lighter note, my despatch job has been fun... Travelling to places I've never been to... Planning my routes... Calling and meeting strangers.... The people are friendly.. I should be earning at least 50bucks next week as I didnt fulfil the minimum 4 sessions per week..

My AGV Flip Up gonna be sold soon... Then I'll have a reason to shop for a new full face since my free AGV got scratched and visor got cracked because I hit KI with it when he tried to hold me back when i refused to stay and talk to him.

I intend to buy a new full set of fairing screws to keep as spare when any of my screw flew off... I have got a fairing bush as spare... I've been trying to collect many of my small little parts to keep as spare just in case.. Feel like investing and get a new fairing too... Maybe race fairing.. Ahackz...

New paintwork should be on its way next year.... Hee... Havent really come up with what sort of paintwork I wanted.. but I should be able to find a suitable one by end of next year...

That's about it for now, I guess...

It's hard to say goodbye to 2008, but I just can't wait to say Hello to 2009..

See ya'll next year~

Shopping Addiction Satisfied #2

I bought a new phone... Weee... Am back to Samsung.... I bought a Samsung F480.. My first touch screen phone and I am totally addicted to it... Bought enhancements as well... Hope it works on me... Hahaha...

Next in line.. I dunno.. New set of tires for my baby... And maybe a 2 way alarm to safe guard my baby...

And of course, my well-deserved trip... Dunno how much I'll be spending.. Haha...

Hate hate hate

Lately, I've been criticizing myself... A little too much at times that I start to really hate myself.. I dunno why these sudden changes in the way I look at myself... Suddenly I just hate everything that I see in the mirror....

I hate my hair, I hate my unsymmetrical eyes, I hate my humps, I hate everything I see.. I dunno why.. And of late, I've been criticizing all my doings... I hate the way I wear my clothes, I hate the way I ride, I hate the way I do things, I hate the way I treat people, I hate the way I let people use me, I hate the way I lie and get others in trouble, I hate trying to advice people because I was practically talking about myself when advising people, I hate the way I smoke, I hate coming to work late, I hate waking up late, I hate having sleepless nights, I hate the bed I sleep on, I just simply hate everything...

Then comes the most hideous part... I start to hate the people around me.... I dunno why... I hate the way they charm people, I hate the way they fall miserably helpless because of others, I hate the way they try to be in the crowd, I hate the way they get so easily misled, I hate the way they laugh, I hate the way they ride, I hate the way they talk... I hate the way they think they're so much better off than me... I hate the way they think the world revolve around them...

What's with me?? Some kind of a hate syndrome or something? Geesh...

Emotions & Love...

Why is it so tough?

As much as I hated him, I still loved him.. I just hope he come to realise how big his head and balls have become... Seriously.. I have came to realise that he's doing it to everyone.. He bruises everyone's ego and yet expect his ego to be stroked..

I just hope it last this time... I'm getting exhausted just trying to keep up... I just hope he stop saying one thing but meant another. Just be honest with me and tell me what you want, for goodness sake. He know I'd happily do what he says, for crying out loud...

Just why have love become such a tough tug of war battle? All I asked for is some public affection. To have him by my side amongst the crowd, to be able to have his hand in mine, to have him walk next to me wherever we go.. to show others we are together and stop ppl from questioning if we are. Everytime there's a meet up, he'll be talking to everyone and approach me last.. That raised brows... Obviously, he didnt realise.. Whenever I ask him to join me and my friends, he refused. That raised brows. Obviously, he only sees it from his little window that I rather be with my friends and not think about how i feel. The fact is, I felt hurt that he didn't wanna be with me when my friends are around.. It almost felt degrading, like my friends are of lower grade, thus he dun wanna mingle with them.. And when we are with our friends, I felt degraded that he spend time talking to them and left me behind in the background, it felt like he enjoyed talking to everyone else but me.. Dun think he ever gave that a thought.

Sometimes, I squirmed at the questions being tossed at me... There're ppl within our group who asked me, "What's the real deal between you two? Just friends, or more? It's so blurry.. So are you his gf?" Well, obviously that wasn't the exact words, but they imply the same definition. What does he think that made me feel? It's almost like it's only me who's trying to be close and show others while he keeps running away.. It made me feel like it's one sided sometimes.. Doubt he realise that too...

I'm not trying to pin point his mistakes, I have my fair share too.. I know I am not perfect, and so I dun expect others to be.. But if he expects me to learn from my mistakes, then I guess it's basic expectations for me to expect him to learn from his mistakes too...

He's just so into the past.. Why can't he just forget, forgive and move forward for better future? Why is there a need to brood into the past? Let me tell you this.. the more you dwell into your past, the less time you have to indulge in the present... And with the little time you have to indulge in the present, what have you got left to invest in the future? Practically nothing... Is it worth to dwell in your past? Is it really worth to keep remembering what others have done you wrong till you forget or fail to realise how much he/she has done for you?

You tell me... I'm listening...