Routine Life without Baby Blast

My life has been routined since Baby Blast decides to ditch me for hurting her.. Good thing is, I began to learn and appreciate my loved ones who helped me along the way.. Baby Blast haven't moved an inch since 2nd May, and since then, my Dearest Dear has been sending me and fetching me from work. I haven't felt so important for so long. And I felt so much loved when I told him it is okay and that I can go to work myself, and he said, I had to get up much earlier, and the fact that I haven't been taking public for 2 years might have taken a toll, and I might just not know where to change the train. And firmly assure me that he will send me to work unless he's not in town. Instantly I felt so important and so loved. And so, life since then became a daily routine, seeing him in the morning, hitching a ride with him to work (and I appreciate it so much, he's making one big round spending at least half an hour of extra sleep), and then him coming to fetch me from work. Sometimes we go for dinner, sometimes we just spend some time talking somewhere. I had so much time with him, and I felt so contented. Yesterday, I went to attend a short workshop and learn so many helpful tips from the experts.. And he came to fetch me after, we went MC that night. Somehow I felt so much closer to him then ever before.. Throughout the night, we held hands, and never really let go. I felt like we belong to each other.. And I came home recapping what I have read in the love language book. And I was a little worried if this is just the "in love" moment. I do show some of the most famous symptoms on being in-love. And sometimes, I'm afraid of waking up and noticing all the bad things that has always been there. The golden question as always, what if? What if one day, he finds me annoyingly irritating because of my short temper? What if one day, he thinks I'm being absurdly brainless to be throwing tantrums just because i'm having that bad day of the month? What if, one day I became a Quality Control and end up saying he's not good enough till he suffocates trying to keep up? Sometimes, this "what-if" fear drains me and often, I short-lived my "in-love" moment by being the monster first. How can one tell that it is worth the try? I dunno.. Dun get me wrong though. I do love sincerely and whole-heartedly.. My fears only shows that I do treasure what I have, and I will treasure it always. And my fear only says that I do know that nothing belonged to me, everything belongs to Allah S.W.T. I am only borrowing what he has gifted me. I just hope and I always pray for what I deserved in His eyes. And what I go through is essential to me because He says so. Perhaps, if I hadn't went through what I went through, I would have been heartless or something. Wallahualam bi shawab. Anyways, business has been great! My email are getting flooded with enquiries and bookings, and its been great pleasure doing home facials for beautiful ladies, and for those who desire to further beautify their look. It's such a pleasure. I hope to be able to help more people by providing my service, in fact, I've extended my service to across the border. How great! Thanks to all my "teachers". Love all of you. And I love my Dearest Dear. Until next time, Wassalam.